Know that experiencing what you don’t want is also a gift – a gift of continual clarity of what you do and don’t want on your wonderful new journey. So, focus your thoughts on your future while appreciating every bit of your now. Affirm your gratitude for everything – yes everything – even ‘bad’ experiences are great teachers. Watch and appreciate what begins to fall into place. Set a daily intention for what you want to experience.
Take conscious control of where you focus your attention. Are your thoughts generating more of what you want? Or are you replaying old familiar themes and can never seem to get a leg up? What you spend your time thinking about, you attract into your life. Give yourself deadlines and be firm but kind to yourself as you move forward. If you want your man to treat you like a queen, act like one.ĭon’t stop at the journal or vision board. Where are you? How are you spending your days? Who are you spending them with? What is this new relationship like? Get clear on the life you want to be living. Happiness isn’t a fate, it’s an objective and an objective needs a plan. Don’t squander this gift or leave it to fate. The Universe has handed you one giant opportunity to reinvent things from scratch. What is the truth in your current world? What were the bad choices that you made and will never make again? What can you learn about this contrast in experience? How does it inform your future desires? What do you need to do to be happy? What needs to change now? You are responsible for past decisions and current circumstances regardless of what went down in your marriage. But put on your miner’s hat – this is fertile ground for exploring!ĭo get yourself a kickass therapist or coach Focusing on what he did wrong will leave you stuck, miserable, and alone. There’s nothing more damaging to the body than a negative attitude.Ī victim blames others and doesn’t see her own responsibility.
They keep you in a victim role and will eventually chip away at your health. We must be 20 strong now when we are all together, but four of us are like an older version of the “sex in the city” crew. She opened me up to an entire community of single women also on a consciously evolving path. Another mother (who was also divorced) and I became fast friends. When I moved on after my divorce, I found myself in Costa Rica on a school trip for my son. Go to wine tastings, networking events and strike up conversation with people who interest you. Want new friends? Ask yourself, “Where are my new friends?” Step out. Who is on your team? Do these women lift you up or bring you down? You may need to make some changes in how you spend your time and with whom. Your normal routine can be flipped on its head, and as a newly single, you won’t want to spend your social time only with other couples. With the ripple effect of divorce come changes in friendships and family relationships.
While you might not be ready to date, don’t hide out. Unleash your inner goddess – the queen that is desperate to be seen. Pursue her as if it were your greatest passion. Go on a retreat, meditate, change what you eat, expand your consciousness – become insatiably curious about discovering this new you. To meet a great guy, you need to be a great woman. What you most need after a divorce is to find you – the you that got lost in that relationship, the you that hid behind work, kids, and the needs of your parents. Unless you are willing to go on 100 bad dates, let’s start from square one. They end up feeling like “there are no good men left, online dating doesn’t work,” and give up after only a couple of months.Įven if you are itching to get back into the game – hold off for now. Most women who jump into the dating pool, end up repeating patterns from past relationships, and choose the wrong man.
…but do you know what that is? Or how to do it? Here are 10 do’s and don’ts to ensure yours is a great do-over:įresh from a newly minted separation or divorce you are definitely not ready to meet Mr. Whether yours was an amicable separation or a full-blown battle, now is your opportunity to begin again and create the life you have always wanted. You may feel battered and bruised coming out of a divorce. Here you are a woman in midlife, starting over after divorce. 10 Do’s And Don’ts For Women Starting Over After Divorce At 50